...Okay...I'm gonna try this. A ranking of Pixar's films from the absolute, ultimate, surpassing-all-other-movies peak of computer-generated cinematic animation excellence, to the merely very good(well, okay, there are a few exceptions that can be labeled "very poor"). Updates to come as new films are released.
They started, of course, with Toy Story in 1995, followed by A Bug's Life in 1998, Toy Story 2in 1999, Monsters, Inc. in 2001, Finding Nemo came along in 2002, The Incredibles burst onto the scene in 2004, Cars fired its engine in 2006, Ratatouille in 2007, WALL-E took orbit in 2008, Upwas in 2009, Toy Story 3 FINALLY came to theaters in 2010, much to high school and college students' delight; Cars 2 was in 2011, Brave in 2012 and Monsters University was the Class of 2013.
These are just my opinions, feel free to argue and lobby for different arrangements if you wish. And if I included all the wonderful quotes and cross-references and everything, this would be a 400-page Word doc, so I'm going to (try) to limit myself to just one from each movie. Although I'm groaning like Andy, "...Just ONE?" They make us laugh a lot, they make us cry often, and they make us think. There's sarcasm and frustration, loneliness and pleasant times, races, fights, sharks, disguises...
I'm thinking if I have time, I'll gonna have to whip up a bunch of individual posts. Okay, here goes:
14 - Brave - A frizzy-haired princess named Merida outshoots a bunch of would-be suitors and thus escapes being forced to marry somebody(or anybody) for now, accidentally turning her mother Queen Elinor into a bear somehow involving an enchanted cake while trying to get her to understand her point of view. A real bear that chomped off her father's leg is eventually killed and her mother returns to her human self after the curse is repealed by repairing a tapestry.
It's a beautiful film; as far as the scenery goes, and it has a brilliant score or soundtrack or whatever you call the musical section, all Irish-Scottish and all, but there's no plot. It's clear as a diamond where this is going in the first ten minutes, and you can't understand a single thing anyone's saying. And even worse, there aren't even any good one-liners to redeem it even slightly.
Grade - 64, D-
13 - Ratatouille - A culinary-minded Parisan rat teaches a young restaurant employee how to cook. The evil owner of the restaurant nearly kills the rat and fires the boy, but doesn't; and the unpleasant food critic is won over, mice in the kitchen is unsanitary, and everyone winds up living happily ever after. Pllyeahhh.
It was the first Pixar movie released after the takeover by Disney, and it feels like a cheap, badly-made Disney CGI-animated flick. And the soundtrack is in French.
Grade - 64, D-
12 - Finding Nemo - (I've got a feeling this will be an unpopular selection for this spot.) After his wife and most of their eggs are killed by a barracuda, clownfish Marlin is a little bit overprotective of his son Nemo. Okay, a lot overprotective, the sort of dad that makes Danny Tanner look ordinary by comparison. Nemo explores out to the drop-off his first day of school, getting picked up by a Sydney dentist named P. Sherman and installed in the office fishtank. Marlin sets out across the Great Barrier Reef to find his son, meeting a neurotic blue fish named Dory, who suffers from "short term memory loss", or perhaps has anterograde amnesia, a condition where new memories can't be formed. Nemo escapes from the tank, Marlin and Dory eventually find him after a host of adventures, and thanks to a group of sea turtles, they're reunited.
This is a very serious movie, more aimed at parents than kids. As such, I can't really appreciate it as well as ought to be appreciated. Also, I don't really know (or care) much about fish and ocean wildlife. Though I do like the Australian accents.
Quote: The Tank Gang's incantation of "Sharkbait! Ooh ha ha!" makes a great volleyball rally cry.
Grade - 74, C
11 - Monsters, Inc. - A gigantic 8-foot tall monster named James P. Sullivan and his small green eyeball pal Mike Wazowski are scarers at Monsters, Inc., the city's biggest energy-collection company. And they're some of the best at terrifying children, which is how their world gets energy. It's a high-risk job, since children are toxic, but...well, somebody's gotta do it. A little 3-year-old human girl named Boo somehow gets trapped in the monster world, and Mike and Sulley have to take care of her and foil the schemes of Sulley's rival scarer Randall and CEO Mr. Waternoose.
No one particular shining quotes, but many, many, wonderful Billy Crystal one-liners in response to something somebody else said.
Grade - 78, C because of the rushed pacing. The entire plot takes about 36 hours from the start to the plot's climax. Great music, though.
10 - The Incredibles - This is the only Pixar movie to not have the Pizza Planet truck somewhere inside, but it does have a cameo of Doc Hudson. Anyway, it has loads of superhero references scattered throughout; the story is of the family of retired superheroes Bob and Helen Parr and their children Violet, Dash and Jack-Jack. They have to band together to thwart a real villain's schemes, and hopefully not kill each other in the process.
It's about the importance of family, even if they are hard to deal with sometimes.
Quote: "I know, I know....freeze." Frozone rolls his eyes and then makes the police officers arresting him into ice sculptures during a vigilante mission with Mr. Incredible.
Grade - 84, B
9 - Cars 2 - After winning his fourth Piston Cup, Lightning McQueen returns for the offseason in Radiator Springs, only to get drawn into the World Grand Prix, a transcontinental race featuring some of the best racers in the world, including sports car Jeff Gorvette, Brazillian and Japanese Le Mans cars, a French rally car and Italian F1 champ. Meanwhile, Mater accidentally gets drawn into a world of espionage working with British agents Finn McMissile and Holley Shiftwell.
It's not perfect, but it's fun. And there's a ton of great music.
Quote: Mater is talking to Holley: "For a second there, I thought you were trying to fix my dents." She says she was. "Well, no thank you. I don't get these dents buffed, pulled, filled or painted by nobody. They're way too valuable." She expresses surprise. "I come by each one of 'em with my best friend Lightning McQueen. I don't fix these. I want to remember these dents forever."
Grade - 87, B
8 - Toy Story 2 - Woody's arm is ripped while playing a little too rough, leaving him at the house while Andy goes to Cowboy Camp. Trying to save a fellow toy from a yard sale, he gets picked up by Al of Al's Toy Barn, who intends to ship Woody and a bunch of other collectibles to a toy museum in Japan. Once in Al's apartment, Woody discovers he was the star of an early 50's TV show called Woody's Roundup, and begins to get to know his fellow castmates Bullseye the horse, Jessie the cowgirl and Stinky Pete the prospector. Meanwhile, Buzz, Slinky, Rex, Mr. Potato Head and Hamm all go on a rescue mission to save Woody and get everyone home again before Andy gets back.
The weakest of the trilogy, but still, that's a pretty high bar to set. More of the favorite characters we love, and it features Geri the cleaner from the chess game in the short before A Bug's Life(also appearing are Flik and Heimlich, and Al's car looks an awful lot like Flo).
Quote: Woody: "You're right, Prospector....I can't stop Woody from growing up. But I wouldn't missi t for the world."
Grade: 87, B
7 - WALL-E- I've only seen this once, but it was amazing. It's almost a completely silent film as far as dialogue goes, yet it's so powerful and compelling... In 2805, Earth has been vacated for centuries due to toxic levels of pollution and trash, with (apparently) only one trash-compactor robot left and a cockroach. Meanwhile, humans are living in spaceshipssuch as the Axiom and are basically controlled by robots, as they've lost the ability to think for themselves and regressed mentally to an infant state while becoming morbidly obese. This lone WALL-E-class robot finds a little plant growing, which is later found and captured by EVE. She and WALL-E return to the Axiom, the Captain decides to turn the ship around to Earth again, which the Autopilot refuses to comply with, having previously been ordered to never return. Eventually humans repopulate the Earth, and the seedling grows into a mighty tree(that possibly could be the one on Ant Island).
Grade - 94, A
6 - Monsters University - Mike Wazowski has always known the fringes; not quite cool enough to hang with or scary enough to be admired. When he goes off to college at Monsters U, well....it's college. So it's pretty awful. In fact, he gets expelled after his freshman year. Sulley coasts through his Scaring 101 class, relying on his natural talent and family history in place of studying. He predictably flunks the course, and in a last-ditch effort to redeem himself, he teams up with a reluctant Mike as they make friends with a bunch of goofy, utterly un-scary frat guys who live in the basement of one guy's mom. Oozma Kappa surprises everyone in the Greek competition of the Scare Games, though, of course, Mike and Sulley are expelled from school and go to work in the Monsters, Inc. mail room.
Captures pretty well the feel of a college campus, which is equally amazing and awesome that they could do that reasonably-accurately and still keep things clean. It doesn't end happily ever after which is great. Because life doesn't usually end that way. And sometimes you do all you can, and it still isn't quite enough. The minor characters are even better than usual(which is saying something), and the scenery is breathtaking. You kind of have to have experienced college life to fully get this movie, which captures this basic truth of campus living: College is harsh and hard to deal with.
Quote: From Art when sneaking onto the lot of Monsters, Inc.: "I can't go back to jail!"
Grade - 87, B
5 - A Bug's Life - A colony of ants is terrorized every season by a grasshopper gang, forced to gather food for the oppressors every year before gathering their own supply. Eccentric outcast Flik is evicted from the community for his inventions causing trouble all the time, and on his travels in the city comes across a troupe of recently-fired circus performers in a bar. Misunderstanding their role in a fight, Flik thinks they're a band of warriors, recruiting them to save the colony from the grasshoppers. This deception leads into further mishaps, leading into the climatic showdown.
Quote - Rosie the black widow, looking at the Blueberries' mural of the circus bugs killing the grasshoppers: "Oh! Look at all the...beautiful...colors of the blood." There's a lot of great quotes from this movie.
Grade - 95, A+
4 - Up - Carl Fredricksen knew that "Adventure was out there...somewhere." One day this quiet boy meets Ellie, a talkative and imaginative girl, and they become friends, eventually get married, and never quite have the money to go to Paradise Falls, which has been where they've wanted to go for always. Just when they're about to leave, Ellie grows ill and dies. A grieving, crabby widower now living alone in their house, one day Carl accidentally injures a construction worker, forcing a court to order him moved to a retirement home. To avoid this, and also to keep his promise to Ellie, Carl turns his house into an airship with thousands of balloons, intending to go to Paradise Falls. A young Wilderness Explorer scout named Russell is brought along by mistake, but they eventually get close and encounter a giant bird named Kevin and a talking Golden Retriever named Dug. Dug's master turns out to be Carl and Ellie's childhood hero Charles Muntz, obsessed with finding a live bird of the same type as the skeleton his reputation was ruined on. That live bird turns out to be Kevin, and so then Carl, Russell and Dug have to protect her(as Russell finds out incredulously, "Kevin's a GIRL??") from Muntz and his pack of dogs. Muntz falls to his death in a chasm, the house is left sitting at the Falls, and Carl gives Russell the "Ellie Badge", a bottle cap he'd kept all his life, which she gave him the day they met.
This is just an absolutely brilliant movie, about grief, about how to go on with life, about how to grow up, so many different things.
Quote: There's lots of great dialogue all through, but the best line is from Ellie: "South America...it's like America, but south!"
Grade - 98, A+
3 - Cars - Lightning McQueen is a rookie headed for history: The very first first-year racer to win the Piston Cup. Blown tires ruin that opportunity, creating a tiebreaker race the next week with his two main rivals, "The King" Strip Weathers, in his last year going for one final title, and perennial runner-up Chick Hicks. He gets stranded in a little town off Route 66 called Radiator Springs, and jailed at the impound after wreaking havoc along the main street. He's sentenced to community service by repairing the road, along the way learning to slow down and enjoy the little things in life; wild times with friends, doing things for others, time with that special someone, appreciating history and learning from it.
I could go into extremely in-depth detail about the whole thing, but that's certainly another post. It involves racing. It has Paul Newman, Owen Wilson, Darrell Waltrip, Bob Costas and Richard Petty in it. There's music by Rascal Flatts, Brad Paisley and Sheryl Crow. So many tiny little details all adding up into an amazing world; the tire-tracks left by the jets, the VW bugs flying around, the great dialogue, the expression of the characters.
Quote: Lightning, surprised to hear Doc's voice on his radio in the tiebreaker. "..I thought you;d said you were never coming back." Doc sighs. "Well, I didn't really have much choice. Mater didn't get to say goodbye." Mater, shouting: "GOODBYE! Okay, I'm good."
Grade - 100, A+
2 - Toy Story - Andy Davis' sixth birthday is next week, and his family is moving then. So his mom throws him a party a week early, which all his toys are a little nervous about. There's Woody, Andy's favorite since kindergarten, Slinky Dog, Rex the fearful dinosaur, Hamm the wisecracking piggy bank, Bo Peep and Mr. Potato Head, plus others. Andy gets a new Buzz Lightyear action figure, who quickly impresses the other toys with more gadgets than a Swiss Army knife, deposing Woody as Andy's favorite toy. Hoping to be taken on a trip to Pizza Planet, Woody attempts to knock Buzz behind the desk, but instead he falls out the window. The other toys, led by Mr. Potato Head and Hamm, accuse Woody of trying to murder Buzz and shove him out the window, too. Both toys latch onto the car, getting into a fight at the Dinoco gas station and falling out of the car, leaving them stranded. They jump into the Pizza Planet truck, but then Buzz jumps into a rocket-shaped claw machine, thinking it will take him back to his home planet, instead of aiming for Molly's stroller. Woody reluctantly follows, and they get taken by Sid Phillips. Inside Sid's house, Buzz discovers he is just a toy through a TV commercial, he and Woody becomes allies as they hatch an escape plan. All of Sid's mangled toys rise up and scare the daylights out of him, presumably changing his destructive ways. Woody and Buzz chase down the moving van by riding RC, missing the truck and falling with style into Andy's mom's car. At the new house at Christmastime, the toys listen as Molly gets a Mrs. Potato Head and Andy gets a puppy. Woody and Buzz share a nervous look, and then credits roll.
This was the first full-length movie to be made completely through computer animation, and it seems impossible not to love it. My generation grew up with it; no telling how many times I've watched it. How many movies can still have merchandise constantly in production and selling 19 years after they premiere in theaters? How many movies have this much impact on culture? (The Princess Bride, It's a Wonderful Life, The Sound of Music, Star Wars, Napoleon Dynamite,and probably others.)
Quote: Mr. Potato Head rearranged his face. "Look! I'm Picasso!" Hamm: "Eh...I don't get it." "You uncultured swine!" Hamm walks away. "What're you lookin' at, ya hockey puck?"
Grade: 100, A+
1 - Toy Story 3 - The movie millions of high school and college students grew up waiting for. Andy's headed to college, and he's just going to take Woody and leave everyone else in the attic. The toys haven't been played with in years, starving for attention. They're okay with this plan - well, kind of. It's sad, but they're putting a brave face on things. Mom thinks the trash bag they're stored in is trash, taking it outside instead of up to the attic. Molly was donating an unwanted Barbie to Sunnyside daycare, so the gang decides to escape the trash bag and ride along with her. Woody follows and tries to explain it was all just a big mistake, but nobody really listens. Instead, they're enthralled with Sunnyside, thinking it looks perfect. Woody attempts to get back to Andy, while Buzz, Jessie, Rex, Slinky, Bullseye and the Potato Heads choose to stay. Woody is found by Bonnie, who picks him up and carries him home to her group of improv-loving toys. Sunnyside isn't quite as advertised - Lotso Huggin' Bear is a dictator, imprisoning most of Andy's dissenting toys and resetting Buzz back to his default space ranger mode. Woody learns Lotso's background story, much like with Jessie and Emily, and goes back to Sunnyside to rescue the gang. They escape, accidentally setting Buzz into Spanish mode, but he re-allies with Woody and again falls in love with Jessie, helping them. Lotso and his gang corner them in a trash truck and the fight continues to the dump, the toys resigning themselves to being burned up by an incinerator. However, at the last minute they're saved by the little green aliens, and Lotso is captured to serve as a hood ornament on a bulldozer. The gang catches a ride on another trash truck back to Andy's, where they hop into their assigned places. At the last minute, Andy decides to give them to Bonnie so they'll still be played with, they play together with all the toys in her yard for a while, and then Andy drives off to college.
Quote: Andy, to Bonnie: "Now, Woody...he's been my pal for as long as I can remember. He's brave, like a cowboy should be. And kind, and smart. But the thing that makes Woody special, is he'll never give up on you...ever. He'll be there for you, no matter what." And to the toys, driving away, Andy just says, "Thanks, guys."
Grade - 100, A+
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