Backyard Kids - What Are They Up To?

  It's a snowy day here in January, and as Sunny Day would have said, "It looks like a winter wonderland!" And with the ranking of Pixar movies and the NHL's Winter Classic both happening recently, that naturally led to reminiscing about the "Backyard Sports" video games, and a fake-news post about what they might be up to now, sort of like this post somebody wrote about the Wishbone cast. (This BuzzFeed article totally applies to my life, haha.)

     "There are those friends you've known forever and talk to nearly constantly. And there are those that you don't hear from often, but are still in contact with. Then there are the type that just seemed like they fell off the face of the earth, and you wonder, "What happened to them, anyway?" The last option is why we decided to catch up with the Backyard Kids and see how they were faring in their young-adult lives.
      Everybody remembers Sunny Day, the polished, loquacious announcer of the neighborhood ball games. She stopped calling the games just after the skateboard craze to focus on school and went on to major in broadcasting at Tech State University, serving as radio voice of the Fighting T-Squares' hockey games. She could not be reached for comment on this story, but sent a polite email saying that she was very busy developing a TV series about Spy Fox.
     Her longtime color commentator, Vinnie the Gooch, can often be found hanging out at Mark's Burger Joint, where Dante Robinson and Kimmy Eckman work, or riding motorcycles with Tony Delvecchio. They hung out a lot together in high school, and more or less graduated. Angela didn't have this problem at all, she took valedictorian honors her senior year, giving her speech with her tassel constantly flopping into her face. She retaliated at the cap by throwing one of her fireballs with it afterwards, spinning it neatly into the aisle where she picked it up on the way out, almost tripping over it. 
     "Ricky Johnson continues to play soccer and football in his spare time, and also took up skateboarding. He now works at Mom and Pop's Skate Shop.
     "Annie Frazier is currently working as a cashier at Weasel Barn while she is studying for her bachelor's in education, she stated that she will be interning at Scheffler Elementary next fall.
     "There are a lot of the kids now in coaching; Jocinda Smith is coach of the Hammers basketball team, Stephanie Morgan leads the Hornets in the Backyard Baseball League, Chuck Downfield is staying involved in the gridiron action as an assistant for the Bombers, Ricky and Annie both coach soccer, for the Wombats and Fishes, respectively, and Buddy Cheque is is trying to teach the Polar Bears how to play hockey out on Duksana Pond.
     Some moved away over the years, like Pablo Sanchez. "He just kind of disappeared one day, nobody's exactly sure what happened to him. We sure miss him, he was a good guy, and a fantastic athlete," said Kiesha Phillips. "The Webber twins were going after careers in pro tennis last I heard. They were great people, even if I did have trouble telling Ashley from Sidney. Mikey Thomas moved during fifth grade."
      According to Frazier, a lot of people attended Billy Jean Blackwood and Marky Du Bois' wedding last summer, music was provided by the Khan brothers' band. "It was fun to see everybody again, great to get to catch up and see how friends were doing." 
     . Always known as Jabberjaw growing up, a trait for which most people tried to avoid her, Gretchen Hasselhoff's bubbly personality is now put to use in her job as a tour guide at Shark Belly Shores amusement park. "Oh, yeah, I haven't heard from a bunch of people in a couple years, well, more like three or four, actually, but, anyway, there's Facebook and Twitter and all that stuff. The Boss is in management at our sister company Walter Weasel World, actually....it's a pain sometimes, but what're you gonna do, you know what I mean?
     "Kenny and that science-y kid put their super-smart brains together and built more robots like Mr. Clanky, pretty awesome if you ask me, that company is probably gonna get super rich, and here we were growing up with the original!
     "Course, not everybody's doing quite as well. Kimmy sort of got into trouble a few years ago, she's working at that restaurant in town, I think. And there was Ronny's whole deal..." 
     The field that once was Eckman Acres is now mostly a flower garden, and Dirt Yards is no more, briefly becoming the Paveway and now housing the Squirrel Creek Shopping Center. This well-documented construction is still looked upon with disfavor by many. Pete Wheeler works as a groundskeeper for the Parks Department, mowing the grass, mainly. He's set a local record as the only person to get a speeding ticket on a Snapper lawn tractor. The police officer who gave him that ticket? None other than the Mad Dog herself,  Lisa Crockett. 
     The gang occasionally gets together for a pickup soccer or baseball game, but those times are rare; everyone is busy going their separate ways and with their lives. Some have kids, some are in college, some have done well, others have had harder times. But they've all been part of some great memories, and provided countless thousands of hours of highlight clips on the Junior Sports Network and YouTube. We can't let their performances on the field define their entire lives, though; instead they ought to have a chance to be ordinary average citizens of the community."

Pixar's Greatest - As of January 2014

   ...Okay...I'm gonna try this. A ranking of Pixar's films from the absolute, ultimate, surpassing-all-other-movies peak of computer-generated cinematic animation excellence, to the merely very good(well, okay, there are a few exceptions that can be labeled "very poor"). Updates to come as new films are released. 

     They started, of course, with Toy Story in 1995, followed by A Bug's Life in 1998, Toy Story 2in 1999, Monsters, Inc. in 2001, Finding Nemo came along in 2002, The Incredibles burst onto the scene in 2004, Cars fired its engine in 2006, Ratatouille in 2007, WALL-E took orbit in 2008, Upwas in 2009, Toy Story 3 FINALLY came to theaters in 2010, much to high school and college students' delight; Cars 2 was in 2011, Brave in 2012 and Monsters University was the Class of 2013.

      These are just my opinions, feel free to argue and lobby for different arrangements if you wish. And if I included all the wonderful quotes and cross-references and everything, this would be a 400-page Word doc, so I'm going to (try) to limit myself to just one from each movie. Although I'm groaning like Andy, "...Just ONE?" They make us laugh a lot, they make us cry often, and they make us think. There's sarcasm and frustration, loneliness and pleasant times, races, fights, sharks, disguises...
     I'm thinking if I have time, I'll gonna have to whip up a bunch of individual posts. Okay, here goes:  

14 - Brave - A frizzy-haired princess named Merida outshoots a bunch of would-be suitors and thus escapes being forced to marry somebody(or anybody) for now, accidentally turning her mother Queen Elinor into a bear somehow involving an enchanted  cake while trying to get her to understand her point of view. A real bear that chomped off her father's leg is eventually killed and her mother returns to her human self after the curse is repealed by repairing a tapestry.
     It's a beautiful film; as far as the scenery goes, and it has a brilliant score or soundtrack or whatever you call the musical section, all Irish-Scottish and all, but there's no plot. It's clear as a diamond where this is going in the first ten minutes, and you can't understand a single thing anyone's saying. And even worse, there aren't even any good one-liners to redeem it even slightly.
Grade - 64, D- 

13 - Ratatouille  - A culinary-minded Parisan rat teaches a young restaurant employee how to cook. The evil owner of the restaurant nearly kills the rat and fires the boy, but doesn't; and the unpleasant food critic is won over, mice in the kitchen is unsanitary, and everyone winds up living happily ever after. Pllyeahhh.
     It was the first Pixar movie released after the takeover by Disney, and it feels like a cheap, badly-made Disney CGI-animated flick. And the soundtrack is in French.
Grade - 64, D- 

12 - Finding Nemo  - (I've got a feeling this will be an unpopular selection for this spot.) After his wife and most of their eggs are killed by a barracuda, clownfish Marlin is a little bit overprotective of his son Nemo. Okay, a lot overprotective, the sort of dad that makes Danny Tanner look ordinary by comparison. Nemo explores out to the drop-off his first day of school, getting picked up by a Sydney dentist named P. Sherman and installed in the office fishtank. Marlin sets out across the Great Barrier Reef to find his son, meeting a neurotic blue fish named Dory, who suffers from "short term memory loss", or perhaps has anterograde amnesia, a condition where new memories can't be formed. Nemo escapes from the tank, Marlin and Dory eventually find him after a host of adventures, and thanks to a group of sea turtles, they're reunited.
     This is a very serious movie, more aimed at parents than kids. As such, I can't really appreciate it as well as ought to be appreciated. Also, I don't really know (or care) much about fish and ocean wildlife. Though I do like the Australian accents.
     Quote: The Tank Gang's incantation of "Sharkbait! Ooh ha ha!" makes a great volleyball rally cry.
     Grade - 74, C 

11 - Monsters, Inc.  - A gigantic 8-foot tall monster named James P. Sullivan and his small green eyeball pal Mike Wazowski are scarers at Monsters, Inc., the city's biggest energy-collection company. And they're some of the best at terrifying children, which is how their world gets energy. It's a high-risk job, since children are toxic, but...well, somebody's gotta do it. A little 3-year-old human girl named Boo somehow gets trapped in the monster world, and Mike and Sulley have to take care of her and foil the schemes of Sulley's rival scarer Randall and CEO Mr. Waternoose. 
     No one particular shining quotes, but many, many, wonderful Billy Crystal one-liners in response to something somebody else said.
     Grade - 78, C because of the rushed pacing. The entire plot takes about 36 hours from the start to the plot's climax. Great music, though.

10 - The Incredibles - This is the only Pixar movie to not have the Pizza Planet truck somewhere inside, but it does have a cameo of Doc Hudson. Anyway, it has loads of superhero references scattered throughout; the story is of the family of retired superheroes Bob and Helen Parr and their children Violet, Dash and Jack-Jack. They have to band together to thwart a real villain's schemes, and hopefully not kill each other in the process.
     It's about the importance of family, even if they are hard to deal with sometimes.
     Quote: "I know, I know....freeze." Frozone rolls his eyes and then makes the police officers arresting him into ice sculptures during a vigilante mission with Mr. Incredible.
     Grade - 84, B 

9 - Cars 2 - After winning his fourth Piston Cup, Lightning McQueen returns for the offseason in Radiator Springs, only to get drawn into the World Grand Prix, a transcontinental race featuring some of the best racers in the world, including sports car Jeff Gorvette, Brazillian and Japanese Le Mans cars, a French rally car and Italian F1 champ. Meanwhile, Mater accidentally gets drawn into a world of espionage working with British agents Finn McMissile and Holley Shiftwell.
     It's not perfect, but it's fun. And there's a ton of great music.
     Quote: Mater is talking to Holley: "For a second there, I thought you were trying to fix my dents." She says she was. "Well, no thank you. I don't get these dents buffed, pulled, filled or painted by nobody. They're way too valuable." She expresses surprise. "I come by each one of 'em with my best friend Lightning McQueen. I don't fix these. I want to remember these dents forever." 
     Grade - 87, B 

8 - Toy Story 2  - Woody's arm is ripped while playing a little too rough, leaving him at the house while Andy goes to Cowboy Camp. Trying to save a fellow toy from a yard sale, he gets picked up by Al of Al's Toy Barn, who intends to ship Woody and a bunch of other collectibles to a toy museum in Japan. Once in Al's apartment, Woody discovers he was the star of an early 50's TV show called Woody's Roundup, and begins to get to know his fellow castmates Bullseye the horse, Jessie the cowgirl and Stinky Pete the prospector. Meanwhile, Buzz, Slinky, Rex, Mr. Potato Head and Hamm all go on a rescue mission to save Woody and get everyone home again before Andy gets back.
     The weakest of the trilogy, but still, that's a pretty high bar to set. More of the favorite characters we love, and it features Geri the cleaner from the chess game in the short before A Bug's Life(also appearing are Flik and Heimlich, and Al's car looks an awful lot like Flo).
     Quote: Woody: "You're right, Prospector....I can't stop Woody from growing up. But I wouldn't missi t for the world."
     Grade: 87, B 

7 - WALL-E- I've only seen this once, but it was amazing. It's almost a completely silent film as far as dialogue goes, yet it's so powerful and compelling... In 2805, Earth has been vacated for centuries due to toxic levels of pollution and trash, with (apparently) only one trash-compactor robot left and a cockroach. Meanwhile, humans are living in spaceshipssuch as the Axiom and are basically controlled by robots, as they've lost the ability to think for themselves and regressed mentally to an infant state while becoming morbidly obese. This lone WALL-E-class robot finds a little plant growing, which is later found and captured by EVE. She and WALL-E return to the Axiom, the Captain decides to turn the ship around to Earth again, which the Autopilot refuses to comply with, having previously been ordered to never return. Eventually humans repopulate the Earth, and the seedling grows into a mighty tree(that possibly could be the one on Ant Island).
     Grade - 94, A 

6 - Monsters University  - Mike Wazowski has always known the fringes; not quite cool enough to hang with or scary enough to be admired. When he goes off to college at Monsters U, well....it's college. So it's pretty awful. In fact, he gets expelled after his freshman year. Sulley coasts through his Scaring 101 class, relying on his natural talent and family history in place of studying. He predictably flunks the course, and in a last-ditch effort to redeem himself, he teams up with a reluctant Mike as they make friends with a bunch of goofy, utterly un-scary frat guys who live in the basement of one guy's mom. Oozma Kappa surprises everyone in the Greek competition of the Scare Games, though, of course, Mike and Sulley are expelled from school and go to work in the Monsters, Inc. mail room.
     Captures pretty well the feel of a college campus, which is equally amazing and awesome that they could do that reasonably-accurately and still keep things clean. It doesn't end happily ever after which is great. Because life doesn't usually end that way. And sometimes you do all you can, and it still isn't quite enough. The minor characters are even better than usual(which is saying something), and the scenery is breathtaking. You kind of have to have experienced college life to fully get this movie, which captures this basic truth of campus living: College is harsh and hard to deal with. 
     Quote: From Art when sneaking onto the lot of Monsters, Inc.: "I can't go back to jail!"
     Grade - 87, B 

5 - A Bug's Life  - A colony of ants is terrorized every season by a grasshopper gang, forced to gather food for the oppressors every year before gathering their own supply. Eccentric outcast Flik is evicted from the community for his inventions causing trouble all the time, and on his travels in the city comes across a troupe of recently-fired circus performers in a bar. Misunderstanding their role in a fight, Flik thinks they're a band of warriors, recruiting them to save the colony from the grasshoppers. This deception leads into further mishaps, leading into the climatic showdown. 
     Quote - Rosie the black widow, looking at the Blueberries' mural of the circus bugs killing the grasshoppers: "Oh! Look at all the...beautiful...colors of the blood." There's a lot of great quotes from this movie.
     Grade - 95, A+ 

4 - Up - Carl Fredricksen knew that "Adventure was out there...somewhere." One day this quiet boy meets Ellie, a talkative and imaginative girl, and they become friends, eventually get married, and never quite have the money to go to Paradise Falls, which has been where they've wanted to go for always. Just when they're about to leave, Ellie grows ill and dies. A grieving, crabby widower now living alone in their house, one day Carl accidentally injures a construction worker, forcing a court to order him moved to a retirement home. To avoid this, and also to keep his promise to Ellie, Carl turns his house into an airship with thousands of balloons, intending to go to Paradise Falls. A young Wilderness Explorer scout named Russell is brought along by mistake, but they eventually get close and encounter a giant bird named Kevin and a talking Golden Retriever named Dug. Dug's master turns out to be Carl and Ellie's childhood hero Charles Muntz, obsessed with finding a live bird of the same type as the skeleton his reputation was ruined on. That live bird turns out to be Kevin, and so then Carl, Russell and Dug have to protect her(as Russell finds out incredulously, "Kevin's a GIRL??")  from Muntz and his pack of dogs. Muntz falls to his death in a chasm, the house is left sitting at the Falls, and Carl gives Russell the "Ellie Badge", a bottle cap he'd kept all his life, which she gave him the day they met. 
      This is just an absolutely brilliant movie, about grief, about how to go on with life, about how to grow up, so many different things.
     Quote: There's lots of great dialogue all through, but the best line is from Ellie: "South America...it's like America, but south!" 
     Grade - 98, A+

3 - Cars -  Lightning McQueen is a rookie headed for history: The very first first-year racer to win the Piston Cup. Blown tires ruin that opportunity, creating a tiebreaker race the next week with his two main rivals, "The King" Strip Weathers, in his last year going for one final title, and perennial runner-up Chick Hicks. He gets stranded in a little town off Route 66 called Radiator Springs, and jailed at the impound after wreaking havoc along the main street. He's sentenced to community service by repairing the road, along the way learning to slow down and enjoy the little things in life; wild times with friends, doing things for others, time with that special someone, appreciating history and learning from it. 
     I could go into extremely in-depth detail about the whole thing, but that's certainly another post. It involves racing. It has Paul Newman, Owen Wilson, Darrell Waltrip, Bob Costas and Richard Petty in it. There's music by Rascal Flatts, Brad Paisley and Sheryl Crow. So many tiny little details all adding up into an amazing world; the tire-tracks left by the jets, the VW bugs flying around, the great dialogue, the expression of the characters. 
     Quote: Lightning, surprised to hear Doc's voice on his radio in the tiebreaker. "..I thought you;d said you were never coming back." Doc sighs. "Well, I didn't really have much choice. Mater didn't get to say goodbye." Mater, shouting: "GOODBYE! Okay, I'm good."
     Grade - 100, A+ 

2 - Toy Story - Andy Davis' sixth birthday is next week, and his family is moving then. So his mom throws him a party a week early, which all his toys are a little nervous about. There's Woody, Andy's favorite since kindergarten, Slinky Dog, Rex the fearful dinosaur, Hamm the wisecracking piggy bank, Bo Peep and Mr. Potato Head, plus others. Andy gets a new Buzz Lightyear action figure, who quickly impresses the other toys with more gadgets than a Swiss Army knife, deposing Woody as Andy's favorite toy. Hoping to be taken on a trip to Pizza Planet, Woody attempts to knock Buzz behind the desk, but instead he falls out the window. The other toys, led by Mr. Potato Head and Hamm, accuse Woody of trying to murder Buzz and shove him out the window, too. Both toys latch onto the car, getting into a fight at the Dinoco gas station and falling out of the car, leaving them stranded. They jump into the Pizza Planet truck, but then Buzz jumps into a rocket-shaped claw machine, thinking it will take him back to his home planet, instead of aiming for Molly's stroller. Woody reluctantly follows, and they get taken by Sid Phillips. Inside Sid's house, Buzz discovers he is just a toy through a TV commercial, he and Woody becomes allies as they hatch an escape plan. All of Sid's mangled toys rise up and scare the daylights out of him, presumably changing his destructive ways. Woody and Buzz chase down the moving van by riding RC, missing the truck and falling with style into Andy's mom's car. At the new house at Christmastime, the toys listen as Molly gets a Mrs. Potato Head and Andy gets a puppy. Woody and Buzz share a nervous look, and then credits roll.
     This was the first full-length movie to be made completely through computer animation, and it seems impossible not to love it. My generation grew up with it; no telling how many times I've watched it. How many movies can still have merchandise constantly in production and selling 19 years after they premiere in theaters? How many movies have this much impact on culture? (The Princess Bride, It's a Wonderful Life, The Sound of Music, Star Wars, Napoleon Dynamite,and probably others.)
     Quote: Mr. Potato Head rearranged his face. "Look! I'm Picasso!" Hamm: "Eh...I don't get it." "You uncultured swine!" Hamm walks away. "What're you lookin' at, ya hockey puck?" 
     Grade: 100, A+ 

1 - Toy Story 3 - The movie millions of high school and college students grew up waiting for. Andy's headed to college, and he's just going to take Woody and leave everyone else in the attic. The toys haven't been played with in years, starving for attention. They're okay with this plan - well, kind of. It's sad, but they're putting a brave face on things. Mom thinks the trash bag they're stored in is trash, taking it outside instead of up to the attic. Molly was donating an unwanted Barbie to Sunnyside daycare, so the gang decides to escape the trash bag and ride along with her. Woody follows and tries to explain it was all just a big mistake, but nobody really listens. Instead, they're enthralled with Sunnyside, thinking it looks perfect. Woody attempts to get back to Andy, while Buzz, Jessie, Rex, Slinky, Bullseye and the Potato Heads choose to stay. Woody is found by Bonnie, who picks him up and carries him home to her group of improv-loving toys. Sunnyside isn't quite as advertised - Lotso Huggin' Bear is a dictator, imprisoning most of Andy's dissenting toys and resetting Buzz back to his default space ranger mode. Woody learns Lotso's background story, much like  with Jessie and Emily,  and goes back to Sunnyside to rescue the gang. They escape, accidentally setting Buzz into Spanish mode, but he re-allies with Woody and again falls in love with Jessie, helping them. Lotso and his gang corner them in a trash truck and the fight continues to the dump, the toys resigning themselves to being burned up by an incinerator. However, at the last minute they're saved by the little green aliens, and Lotso is captured to serve as a hood ornament on a bulldozer. The gang catches a ride on another trash truck back to Andy's, where they hop into their assigned places. At the last minute, Andy decides to give them to Bonnie so they'll still be played with, they play together with all the toys in her yard for a while, and then Andy drives off to college. 
     Quote: Andy, to Bonnie: "Now, Woody...he's been my pal for as long as I can remember. He's brave, like a cowboy should be. And kind, and smart. But the thing that makes Woody special, is he'll never give up on you...ever. He'll be there for you, no matter what." And to the toys, driving away, Andy just says, "Thanks, guys."
     Grade - 100, A+

Obscure Facts About "The Big Green"

    I love The Big Green, one of those movies I grew up watching. Part of the fun of memorizing dialogue and camera-angle changes and everything else is that then you can spend the movie searching for hidden little background details, some of which I've listed here.

     The population of Elma, Texas, was 2,367 when the welcome sign was first installed. As the town got smaller, two other figures were spray-painted on below that number and then crossed out, the current number is somewhere around 923 residents. There is no such town in existence. Tom tracks down Juan and his mom in Garrettville, which doesn't exist, either. Elma is part of Lane County, which is also fictional. 

     The local high school's teams were known as the Armadillos, according to the billboard Anna Montgomery drives by off Route 49 in the beginning. Elma High won 3A football state titles in 1968, 1969, 1974, 1975 and 1976.

     The bag of Cheetos the birds eat off the boys is Super Sized, and the Cheetos are the puffed kind.

     Anna's last name is Montgomery, Tom's last name is Palmer, and then the full names of the kids are Evan Schiff, Larry Musgrove, Jeffrey Luttrell, Newt Shaw, Kate Douglas, Juan Morales, Tak Yomato, Nick Anderssen, Sophia Convertino, Polly Nielson and Sue and Lou Gates.
     Kate's alcoholic dad is Ed, Larry's bartender father is Cookie and Polly's mom is Brenda, who is married to Darius.

     Sue and Lou have asthma, Tak can burp the ABCs, Kate's parents are divorced and Larry's dad has a job. These are all the responses we know of to Anna's questioning what makes each of the kids special once she meets them on the first day of school. Kate also whittles on her desk with a huge pocketknife(three times), and the bench outside Polly's mom's gas station.

     In the scene where we first meet Sheriff Tom, there's a flier on the wall that says the "Cowboy's Professional Rodeo Association Finals" will be held somewhere unreadable, the date is hard to read, but appears to be December 13, 1996. Nobody caught the misplaced apostrophe? And there would be a flier posted for something that will happen a whole year away?

     Anna is left-handed, because when Tom meets her while she's on her run, her watch is on her right wrist, and also when she's wearing a different watch while teaching math. (Kate is also left-handed, as seen in when talking about being a cashier at the Piggly-Wiggly.)

     Unleaded gasoline was selling for 98 cents a gallon at the Texaco station, regular gasoline was $1.15 a gallon. A black-and-white two-year-old dog named Bubba is lost, according to the sign on the door, there's a reward out for him. There's also an upcoming BBQ supper for the volunteer fire department on Saturday the 9th at the high school, $5 a plate.

     The principal mispronounces Juan's name when introducing him, she says it "Joo-wan More-ray-leese." Larry calls geography class "geology" class.

     Tom describes soccer to Newt as "kind of like kickball, mixed with that-there hockey."

     Anna drives a maroon Mercedes convertible, license-plate number 344-570, and it has two bumper stickers on the back. Tom's patrol car has a license-plate number of 530-743. 

     Besides the Big Green(green/white jerseys) and the Knights(black/silver), other teams in the league include the Terminators(royal blue/white), the Ninjas(white/black/red), the Walking Dead(red/white), the Buccaneers(red/black), and the Vikings(orange/white).

     I love all the shots from ground level during the games, following along behind the ball. My favorite line of all time about team spirit is where Sophia yells back at the Knights taunting the group, "We're not the Nothings from Nowhere! We're the Elma Nothings!"

     In the team-naming scene, Larry sums up Tom's job as "giving out speeding tickets and cleaning up dead animals off the highway." Coach Anna's four areas of practice are Fitness, Tactics, Technique and Game Psychology. Her first running session lasts for twelve minutes.

     One of the things Anna teaches in class is how to use the proper editing symbols for needed capitalization, period insertion, comma insertion, adding something in later you forgot to include, and adding punctuation marks.

     When scoring on Larry in practice, Juan first knees the ball three times, then heads it twenty-two times in a row before shooting.

     In the rain-soccer scene(one of my favorite montages in all cinematic history), there's a black Lab that decides to join in on the fun, so it's not just Ernie the goat that plays the game!

     Besides Ernie the Goat(owned by Polly), that black Lab in the rain game, and the five cows that get loose, there's a gigantic German shepherd-looking dog on the truck in the junkyard when Tom recruits Newt, and some type of sheepdog in Larry's dad's bar. Could any of those dogs be the missing Bubba? 

     Jersey numbers for the team: 0 Larry, 2-A Sue, 2-B Lou, 4 Evan, 8 Nick,  9 Sophia, 10 Juan,  11 Jeffrey, 12 Polly, 13 Kate, 14 Tak, 85 Newt.

     The Big Green's regular season record is 7-2-1 according to the chalk marks, but they pick up another win somewhere before the title game, as the announcer says their record is 8-2-1. Maybe there were semifinal games played?

     Jay Huffer's normal job is an auditor for the IRS. (Can the guy get any less-likable?) Also, Larry's dad's bar has a Christmas tree in the back corner by the pool table.

     One of the cars sitting around the Morales' trailer park is a silver Pontiac Firebird.

     The Big Green score fourteen goals that we see during the movie. During the shootout, the order chosen is Juan, Kate, Nick, and Sophia, with Newt volunteering to take the last shot. Juan sinks his kick into the low left corner. Kate nails her shot chest-high left-center, Sophia crushes the ball into the high left corner.  Nick's ball sails just over the top bar right of center. And finally, Newt, of course, wins the game on the final kick.

     We don't really know much of who plays where position-wise, other than Larry is goalie(obviously), Juan is mentioned as center halfback, and based on her relentless pesky ball-swiping attempts, Polly is a defender.

     Not only did the kids win the Austin Junior Division league during Anna's time in the teaching exchange program, but their test scores rose all the way to fourth-highest in the whole state.

Go With the Flow

     Another story based off our SWAT skits.

“Here you go, Mary, here’s today’s mail.” Frank the mailman said, handing her the letters and bills of the day, plus several random magazines that came periodically without reason.

“Thanks, Frank. Oh, this is for you.” she answered, taking the mail and handing him a plastic container.

“Um…thank you, I think. What is it?”

“Some cookies and fudge, just call it a sort of thank-you present for your good work over the year. And with the weather getting colder, we’ve just felt like baking a lot, so…” Mary shrugged with a smile.

“Okay. Thanks. This wouldn’t be any….what do you call it, Christian charity, would it?” Frank asked with suspicion.

“Some people think of it that way, but it’s just cookies.” she replied carefully.

“Well, whatever you want to call it.” He rolled his Jeep Cherokee down to the next house.

  Mary turned back inside, pausing to let Raindrop outside before stepping in. “Why can’t you be more like your mother?” she directed this comment to the frolicking black-and-white dog, knowing she’d ask to come back inside at the most inopportune time.

“Because…eh….well. Isn’t it obvious?” Janie tried to answer this without crossing the line, mistakingly thinking the question was meant for her.

“I was talking to the dog.”

“Oh.”

“Guys! Be quiet! And grab the phone. We’ve got a chance to win tickets to Go With the Flow.”  Pete hissed.

“Really?!” Mary flew to the house phone.

“Yeah, K95. They’re gonna have Quentin Gage and Candy Karpinski promoting their new movie, and even the Killer from Slice and Dice. Maddie was telling me about it.”

Janie whipped her phone from her jeans and began dialing the radio station’s number.

Tense pause.

“Hey! It’s ringing.” Pete said hopefully.

His mom and sister watched anxiously.

“Hi, you’ve reached K95, this is Jim. You’re caller number ten; which means you’ll get a chance to play for tickets to Go With the Flow. You ready?”

“Uh, yes; yes, I am.” He made frantic motions to turn on the radio, Janie vaulted across the room and flicked it on.

“Okay, what’s your name, and where are you from?”  Jim the radio host asked. 

“Pete Morgan, and I’m from Ritter Hill.”  

“Mmkayy….I’m gonna put you on hold for a minute, and then when these songs are over we’ll play for the tickets, all right?”

“Okay.”

“Can you believe this?” he mouthed. They shook their heads.

“Come on, bro…you got this.” Janie breathed.

“Oh, I hope you win! That’d be so awesome…” Mary squealed.

Pete raised an eyebrow and made a “shh” gesture.

“MOM!” Janie snapped, exasperated.

“Hello, folks, we’ve got Pete from Ritter Hill today, he’ll be playing for tickets to go see an upcoming episode of the Go With the Flow game show.” Jim told the radio audience. “Pete, you ready?”

“Ready.”

“Okay, here’s the plan. We’ll ask you four questions, and you have to answer them all in ten seconds, but you have to answer them wrong, got it?” Jim’s co-host Kelly asked.

“Okay, I think I got it,” he nodded.

“Okay, then. Time will start when I finish reading the first question.”

Mary and Janie, huddled by the radio, looked at each other, wondering what could be so hard about this. Wasn’t there usually a catch to these radio and TV call-in contests?

“Here we go….How many months are in a year?” Jim asked.

“Four.” Pete replied immediately.

Mary and Janie’s jaws dropped. “How did he even…”

“What’s the opposite of ‘big’?” Kelly asked.

“Giant.” Pete answered promptly.

Mary shook her head.

“What planet do we live on?” Kelly asked again.

“Mars.”

A dishtowel was being furiously wrung by an agitated Mary.

“What river runs through Tulsa?” Jim asked the final question.

Pete’s reply didn’t come instantly, there was a fraction of a second of silence. Don’t say Arkansas, he thought to himself. “The…Missouri.” That is a real river, isn’t it?

Clapping could be heard from the radio station. “You just won yourself four tickets to go see a taping of Go With the Flow, man!” Jim congratulated. “Which station do you spell country with?”

“It’s spelled K95.5 FM.” Pete grinned.

Some behind-the-scenes sounds, the radio started playing Brad Paisley’s “Welcome to the Future”, then Kelly spoke up again. Janie turned the radio off.

“Okay, I just need to get your information, so we’ll know who to hold the tickets for, and then you can just come by the station and pick ‘em up, okay?”

After a few more minutes, he hung up.

“I don’t even believe it…” Janie was shaking her head, grinning.

“That was AWESOME, Pete! Wasn’t it, Yahoo?!” Mary danced their newest of the pack, a brown mixed-breed Lab, around in a circle. He didn’t think much of the dancing lesson.

“No way I could have done that, answering all those questions wrong in that short of time.”

“Me neither!” Janie agreed.

He shrugged. “Well…”

“Guess it doesn’t hurt to be dating the cousin of a game-show host, huh, son?” George said later that night once he’d gotten home from work.

“DaaaAAAddd….it’s not….We’re not dating right now. Anymore.” He coughed, looking to Janie for rescue.

“Dad, Pete and Maddie never were officially going out. With TJ, that kinda…well. And it’s not like that had anything to do with him winning the tickets.”

“Well, actually, she told me what day and time K95 would be running the contest…”

“Whatever you want to call it, like I said, it doesn’t hurt.” George said.

Pete and Janie rolled their eyes and bolted out of the room as quickly as they could.

“They weren’t ‘officially’ going out? What’s that supposed to mean? How is it ‘official’, then?” George asked his wife in a moment of 21st century-father confusion.  

Mary merely smiled to herself as she cleaned up the table from dinner.

“I think it means you’re being too nosy, dear.”

  

They were in Kansas City, the show was traveling around the country while the building the permanent set was in was undergoing a remodel, and producers thought taking it around the country might boost ratings. George had to work, but the rest of the family was there in the audience, along with Maddie Kojak, Pete’s one-time girlfriend and a close collaborator with Janie on different theatrical pursuits. She was also the cousin of the show’s host, Matt, and occasionally filled in for him when necessary.

“I can’t believe we’re actually here!” Mary exclaimed wonderingly for what must have been at least the nineteenth time that day. “Well, Mom…we are.” Janie said, giggling nervously. “That’s right, Rapunzel.” agreed Pete. She looked at him. “That was exactly the same tone as when Rapunzel says ‘That’s the funny thing about birthdays; they’re kind of an annual thing.’ in Tangled.” “Got it now.”

“Nice work, Snoopy.” Maddie said, high-fiving him. “Come on, guys, follow me.”

“But they’re about to start filming soon.”

She grinned. “It’s cool, don’t worry about it. We’ll be back in plenty of time.”

They followed her, rather uncertainly at first. Maddie confidently took a left into a space that clearly didn’t exist before, nodded at one of the security guys and held up a lanyard. “It’s okay, Ricardo, they’re with me. Do y’all have a date for the wedding set by now?”

“Hey, Miss Maddie, good to see you again. Wasn’t expecting to, though-“ “Just as audience member today.”

“Oh, I see.” (To the Morgans) “Enjoy your tour!” (To Maddie) “April 28th, kinda worried. Lauren is getting a little obsessed with the details.”

“It’s a girl thing. You’ll survive, don’t worry.”

They continued on, stopping at a cubicle with a mirror and a bunch of makeup. “Knock knock,” Maddie said brightly.

A man in a suit jacket and dressy Levi’s entered from somewhere. “Hey, Madd! How you doing?!” He gave her a bear hug. He also whispered something into her ear. “We ran into some trouble…gonna have to pick somebody from the audience.” “Think I can handle that.” she whispered back.

“I’m doing great,” she said in a normal tone. “Came up here with some friends, thought I’d surprise ‘em with the backstage look around. You mind?”

“Course not. Come on in, you guys.”

“Is that really….?” Janie hissed in Pete’s ear. “I think, yes.” He hissed back.

“I’m Matt, nice to meet you guys.”

Handshakes and introductions all around.

“Can I….could I have a picture with you?” Mary asked nervously. “This is, like, my favorite game show of all time.”

“Wow, even more than Jeopardy? I’m impressed.” Matt said. “Of course I don’t mind.” (To someone in the corridor.) “Hey, Stephen, can you snap a few pics for us? Friends of Maddie’s.”

“Thanks so much, it was great to meet you.” They all were slightly in shock as they left.

“Hey, Matt?”

“Yeah?”

“I finally talked Mom into giving you Deb’s fudge pecan pie recipe.”

“No. Way. Seriously?”

“Yep. Here it is.” She handed him the recipe, stored from somewhere in her purse. “Could I pick up those autographs for them that I asked for?”

“Sure can…they’re right here.” He pulled them from a drawer, along with a special oversize index card embossed with the official silver and lime green show logo and sticky putty on one side. She tucked them into her purse. “Thanks, I’ll see ya soon.”

Maddie quickly caught up to the others and they hurried back to their seats, dodging cameras and stage lights along the way, cables were strewn all over the floor, they looked highly trippable to the Morgans.

Eventually the lights came on, cameras were positioned right, the audience silenced, and a big flashing red sign marked “ON AIR” started blinking.

Matt Kojak strolled confidently onto the stage, greeting the camera with a grin and nod. The audience went wild. “Thank you, thank you, everyone! Welcome to Go With the Flow! It’s the game show where everyone’s a winner. (As long as they agree.) I’m your host, Matt Kojak, and today’s show is a special celebrity edition, with all winnings going to local charities.”

The crowd approved this statement.

“So, with that out of the way, let’s meet our contestants! You’ll recognize our first guest as Colin Thayer from the blockbuster hit movie Return to Titanic,  widely regarded by many magazines as one of the hottest young men alive – give a warm welcome to Quentin Gage!”

The women watching, who composed most of the audience, went into hysterics.

“Nice, huh?” Maddie nudged Janie, grinning. Except she wasn’t there…

“Uh, Janie…?”

She was racing up to the stage screaming, “OH MY GOSH, IT’S QUENTIN!!!” and locked herself in a death grip on one leg. Matt frowned, and nodded at Rebecca the security guard to get her off. “No, no! I LOVE YOUUU, QUENTIN!!!!!!” as she was dragged away.

“Crap…” Pete muttered, watching the scene.

 “Well, she sure thought you were looking good today, Quentin. Welcome to the show.” Matt smoothly snapped back into polished TV personality mode.

“I always look good.” The actor replied with careless flair. Most of the women swooned. Those who didn’t loudly voiced their agreement.

Matt smiled blandly. “Of course.”

“Let’s meet our next contestant,” he continued. “She’s an…international TV movie star, everybody’s dream girl, Candy Karpinski!”

Now the men in the audience loudly voiced their approval.

Candy waltzed into her seat in the row and sat down.

“Thanks for taking part in our show, Candy. What charity are you going to donate your winnings to today?”

She reflected an instant, then declared, “Women today are not treated with respect today, Matt, so I want to combat that by giving my money to a shelter for battered women.”

Quentin, and Matt, and most of the men in the audience merely stared at her.

“Pete!” Maddie smacked him lightly on the head.

            “Matt, are you listening to me?” Candy sounded irritated.

“Actually, I have no idea what you just said. But you looked great saying it.”

Candy rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, disgusted.

“But that sounds like a great cause, don’t you think so, Quentin?”

Still ogling her, the actor replied “Whatever, man.”

“Okay…” Matt motioned for him to move to the end chair, to give her some space.

“Let’s meet our third contestant. He’s known the world over, even though no one has ever seen his face – please welcome the Killer from Slice and Dice!”

Loud applause, mostly from the younger people.

Two terrified teens, one of which was Janie, raced across the stage screaming. In their wake came a figure clad in black robes and a cowl with a hideous skull-like blood-red tattoo covering his face, waving a machete around. Janie almost plowed into Matt in her hurry to escape. He stepped in front of the masked figure.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! There’ll be plenty of time for that after the show. For now, let’s win some money for charity, okay? Just sit down right there…” he motioned to the seat between Quentin and Candy.

“Our final guest, Barney the Purple Dinosaur, couldn’t be here today because we discovered he wasn’t famous anymore.” Loud groans, as well as some chuckles, from the audience. Somebody hollered, “Say it ain’t so!”

Matt winced, sharing their pain. “Yes, I’m afraid it’s true…so, that means we’ll have to find a fourth contestant. Reach under your seat, and if you’ve got an index card taped there, then you’re our lucky fourth contestant!”

Most heads in the audience disappeared as people ducked to see if they might be the person.

“AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!” Mary squealed. “That’s me, that’s me!!!!!!!”

The host grinned. “Well, come on down! You’re about to Go With the Flow!”

Mary raced down there excitedly, Pete reveled in his mother’s joy. Beside him, Maddie grinned. “You did not….” he started to say.

“Guilty. But don’t you dare tell.”

“What’s your name, and where are you from?” Matt asked the randomly-selected audience contestant.

“Um…my name is Mary, and I’m from Tulsa, Oklahoma.”

“Okay, Mary from Tulsa, do you know the rules to Go With the Flow?” Matt asked.

“Of course she does.” Pete snorted.

Blank stare from Mary, she froze. Candy was feeling sorry for her, recalling the myriad of auditions she’d flunked. Quentin was wondering where to get a good burger after the show, and the actor behind the Killer’s mask was trying to figure out how he wound up doing this.

“Uh, Matt…..I know the rules, I love this show, but with all the excitement….they disappeared.”

“Mom?” Pete did a double take.

“Okay, that’s all right, sometimes we can just get a little rattled,” Matt said swiftly. “It’s really simple; I ask a question, and the person who controls the board answers. Then the rest of you say whether you agree or not. If you all go with the flow and agree, then you win $500 for charity! How’s that sound?”

“Sounds great.”

“And what charity are you going to donate your winnings to today?”

Mary thought a second. “I’ll donate them to Grace Bible Church in Tulsa.”

“Okay, I’m sure they could use the money and put it to good use.” The audience chuckled at Matt’s flippant remark.

“You’ll get the first question,” he continued, looking at Mary. “Say you come across someone lying hurt and bleeding on the road. What would you do?”

“What is ‘I would help them’?”

“Wrong show.” More giggles from the crowd. “But that’s a good answer, though. How about you, Quentin?”

“Me too, Bob. For sure.”

“My name is Matt. Candy?”

“Of course I would help them.” Candy replied charmingly.

“Killer?”

The Killer thought a minute, shrugged, then gave a thumbs-up sign.

“Way to go with the flow! Looks like we’ve just won $500 for charity.” The audience went wild.

“Next question: Quentin, you’re at a huge Hollywood party with all your friends and entourage and hangers-on and paparazzi and everything, and there’s several producers you want to impress there, too. Somebody at the party offers you some marijuana. What do you do?”

The star thought a minute. “Well, it’s a little hard to imagine a party where everyone’s not trying to impress me, but I’m an actor, so I’ll try.”

“Good idea,” Matt dropped dryly.

“I’d have to say that I would smoke that joint, and definitely inhale and enjoy it.”

“Mmkayy…there’s his answer. What do you say, Candy?”

“…I guess so. I mean, it’s for charity, right?”

Matt shrugged. “Sure, whatever you want to believe. Killer?”

The Killer held a make-believe joint up to his lips and took a big drag. The crowd went wild.

“Looks like everybody else is going with the flow, so it’s up to you.” Matt said to Mary.

“No, I wouldn’t do that! It’s bad for you. And it’s illegal!”

Everyone looked startled. Matt frowned.

“That – that’s going against the flow. No money awarded for that one…You’re sure you understand the rules?”

“Yes, I understand.” Mary answered composedly.

“All right…let’s try again. Candy, you’re offered the lead role in a major upcoming movie, but if you accept the part, you’ll have to do several steamy love scenes. Will you do it?”

With the slightest twinge of irony, she said, “I’m assuming it’s essential to the plot of the movie.”

“Always seems to be, doesn’t it?” the host fired back quickly, with seeming perfect seriousness.

“You’re right. Sure, I’ll do it.”

“How ‘bout you, Quent? I can call you Quent, right?”

“No.”

“Okay, sorry, Quentin.”

“I pardon you.” (Pause) “What was the question?”

“Would you do a steamy love scene?” Matt was thinking to himself that being a game-show host wasn’t always what it seemed like it was cracked up to be. Maddie was feeling grateful that this situation didn’t come up on a day when she was hosting.

“Sure thing, Pat.” Quentin replied carelessly.

“It’s Matt. Killer?”

The Killer jumped up and started to disrobe. Matt leaped in front of him, hiding the scene from the cameras.

“Killer, stop! This is a family show! And we don’t want to get the FCC involved, that would be bad for everybody. And so…just, this isn’t the place.”

The Killer nodded and meekly sat back down.

“Well, would you do it?” Matt quickly got things back on track, directing the question to Mary.

She looked shocked. “No way!!!”

Now Matt looked shocked. “She…she did it again, folks. You’re still going against the flow. No money awarded – again.”

“How stupid can you be?” Quentin asked angrily.

“Just go with the flow! It’s for charity.” Candy pleaded.

“Okay, everyone, I’m sure we can all agree on this one. For the Killer; if you were guaranteed that nobody would catch you, would you murder a complete stranger for a million dollars?”

The Killer brandished his machete and swung it across his throat. Mary scooted her chair a couple inches in the other direction.

“Who am I kidding? He’d do it for free.” Matt tossed this aside to the audience. They chuckled in appreciation. “Quentin?”

“Sure, it’s just one person.”

Matt frowned. This show really was not going according to plan today. “Okay…that’s a little scary, but we’ll accept it. Candy?”

“I’d kill ‘em and then give the money to charity.”

“How sweet. Okay, Mary, it’s up to you; Will you go with the flow?”

“You people are insane! No, I would not kill a random stranger.”

The Killer brandished his knife and moved towards Mary. Matt leaped forwards again to stop him from inflicting any real damage.

“No murders on the show! That’s not allowed, either!”

The Killer stormed offstage.

“This is the lamest thing I’ve ever done! I’m firing my publicist.” Quentin fumed, stalking away.

“We hardly have any money for charity. How can you be so heartless?” Candy implored, almost in tears.

“Well…you’ve kind of ruined the show today. What do you have to say for yourself?” Matt asked Mary.

She bit her lip, then said, “…I guess sometimes you just gotta do the right thing and stand up against the flow sometimes.”

“Well….whatever helps you sleep at night. Sorry for the show today, folks; hopefully we’ll someone more willing to go with the flow tomorrow. Until then, I’m Matt Kojak, signing off.”

The blinking red “ON AIR” sign shut off, leaving the studio audience rather stunned.